Pardon my cliché, but when it comes to this year's Holiday season, All I have to say is...
BAH HUMBUG.
As you can assume, the Christmas season of 2013 has been HORRIBLE so far. And it all started with the day before Thanksgiving. I was in the process of moving into my parents' house, and I accidentally ran the Uhaul over our well pump. It broke, and water began to spew out of it like lies from the White House. We got the well fixed on Thanksgiving day, but not before my parents guilt-tripped me half to death.
Let's talk about Mikey for a moment. Everything in his path is a sitting duck, waiting to be demolished, devoured, broken, burnt, or otherwise made defunct. Well, I shouldn't say everything. Only the valuable, or useful, or most dangerous things. That's all he wants to play with! If we had a priceless ancient artifact in the room, or a vat of acid, or the Holy Grail, rest assured. Mikey would be going for those things first. He somewhat reminds me of Taz. Or a hurricane. Or a forest fire. Look, the point is, nothing sacred is safe when Mikey enters the room.
Just a few days ago, my mom got a check from my uncle. It was a pretty sizable check too. My mom turns to me and says, "I hope you know that half of this check is going to pay for you running over the well pump." Right. Just keep laying on the guilt. She didn't NEED to say that. She said it to upset and belittle me. I feel like a sponge for other people's negative emotions. It's almost as if people see me as a free punching bag.
Oh and YESTERDAY. Let's talk about how close to the Gates of Hell yesterday was! I was at work. It was my second day of work in fact. And I get a call from the HR office telling me that my wife had left the keys to the car in the office and that I need to pick them up. When I arrived in the HR office, they failed to mention that a.) there was a security guard there, and b.) that my wife dropped the keys off because she was on her way to the Emergency Room via ambulance, and c.) that she broke her ankle!
And you know what I just realized while writing this post? Today is Friday the 13th. I'm not sure how much worse things can get, although I think I'll just count my blessings, so things DON'T get worse. I'm just hoping no turds hit the fan today any more than they have already.
At any rate, I can definitely see a transformation happening. My love for Christmas and the Christmas season is just about gone. At least for this year. Hopefully next year Pandora's Box won't be sitting underneath the tree.
Once again, I'd like to remind you readers to have a sense of humor when reading this post.
BAH HUMBUG.
As you can assume, the Christmas season of 2013 has been HORRIBLE so far. And it all started with the day before Thanksgiving. I was in the process of moving into my parents' house, and I accidentally ran the Uhaul over our well pump. It broke, and water began to spew out of it like lies from the White House. We got the well fixed on Thanksgiving day, but not before my parents guilt-tripped me half to death.
Let's talk about Mikey for a moment. Everything in his path is a sitting duck, waiting to be demolished, devoured, broken, burnt, or otherwise made defunct. Well, I shouldn't say everything. Only the valuable, or useful, or most dangerous things. That's all he wants to play with! If we had a priceless ancient artifact in the room, or a vat of acid, or the Holy Grail, rest assured. Mikey would be going for those things first. He somewhat reminds me of Taz. Or a hurricane. Or a forest fire. Look, the point is, nothing sacred is safe when Mikey enters the room.
Just a few days ago, my mom got a check from my uncle. It was a pretty sizable check too. My mom turns to me and says, "I hope you know that half of this check is going to pay for you running over the well pump." Right. Just keep laying on the guilt. She didn't NEED to say that. She said it to upset and belittle me. I feel like a sponge for other people's negative emotions. It's almost as if people see me as a free punching bag.
Oh and YESTERDAY. Let's talk about how close to the Gates of Hell yesterday was! I was at work. It was my second day of work in fact. And I get a call from the HR office telling me that my wife had left the keys to the car in the office and that I need to pick them up. When I arrived in the HR office, they failed to mention that a.) there was a security guard there, and b.) that my wife dropped the keys off because she was on her way to the Emergency Room via ambulance, and c.) that she broke her ankle!
And you know what I just realized while writing this post? Today is Friday the 13th. I'm not sure how much worse things can get, although I think I'll just count my blessings, so things DON'T get worse. I'm just hoping no turds hit the fan today any more than they have already.
At any rate, I can definitely see a transformation happening. My love for Christmas and the Christmas season is just about gone. At least for this year. Hopefully next year Pandora's Box won't be sitting underneath the tree.
Once again, I'd like to remind you readers to have a sense of humor when reading this post.